Why Lemony?
(the “About Me” page)

October 04, 2007

Here are those ten things I like about myself that have been requested

I'm going to have to come out of my cocoon for this one. That's fine. I'm ready for people now.

1. I accomplished a goal that I thought was practically impossible. I was elected in March to the position of Treasurer of our Baha'i community's Local Spiritual Assembly, which automatically made me the treasurer of the fund for our local Baha'i Center too. This was arguably the craziest thing I've ever been asked to do in a Baha'i capacity since I am not mathematically gifted, spreadsheet savvy, or money-minded. However, I was assured that the treasurer's role is more one of education and communication and that I should get some assistants to do the number crunching. I inherited two great smartie-pants assistants to that end and they've been teaching me all about their areas of expertise and I've been struggling to keep my head up above the ocean of accounting concepts and financial procedures for the last six months. So here's that impossible goal I mentioned: Get all of the finances of our community figured out, straightened out, and all together in one document that is understandable by someone like me and then figure out a way to present it to the community in such a way that they understand it to a depth that they know exactly where we need to be financially to meet our expenses and goals. And that is what we accomplished on September 23rd, 2007 at a big meeting with a very big colorful bar graph and clear, simple handouts. I think the hardest part was getting myself over that initial gag reflex when I had to set my mind toward money and take in pages full of numbers. That and the huge responsibility of shepherding very large amounts of money that don't belong to me. I can see that I've grown new abilities and awarenesses and that's a beautiful thing.

2. (Related to 1) The big perk of this job is that I get the opportunity to go meet all the other treasurers at a national conference so I can learn how to do this job and also commiserate. The conference is in Maine this year. And I'm driving. By myself! Through the Appalachian mountians! My best-loved mountains in the world. I like it that I enjoy spending time by myself and that I'm giving myself that opportunity. I've been feeling the need for a spiritual retreat for the last many months and I like that I am giving myself what I need.

3. I am deep in the process of overhauling my physical lifestyle to make sure that I am doing my part to have a healthy, long life. I've never done this to such a great extent as I'm doing now and it's really hard, but it's definitely worth it. And that feeling is what I like about myself. Some of the specifics are: exercising regularly, eating less in total, eating less sugar and wheat, eating more vegetables and fruits, listening to my body about what it needs. As a rule, I don't go on diets, but I am eager to make lifestyle changes if they can really be long-term and have a noticeable effect on my energy levels and happiness and make my body work better (and help me not get diabetes or heart disease or cancer- all of which are in my family to some degree). As a part of this, we bought an elliptical trainer so I can exercise easily in the winter. We bought it on e-bay so I have to pick it up in Connecticut. But- no problem, I'm passing through there anyways on my way to Maine. It's all part of the plan.

4. I like it that I have moved past the fake, judgemental question of 'am I a good mom or a bad mom?' and I am really interested in developing the qualities that help motherhood along, which are basically the same as spiritual qualities that I'm trying to develop anyways. So I could say that I'm a good mom just for brevity, but I don't find it very meaningful. I'd rather say that I have a great set of skills that I've developed over the last eight years that include a very deep patience, an intuitive understanding of how to deal with very complicated and highly emotional situations, peacekeeping skills, and a clear working knowledge of my limitations and strengths. See, isn't that more interesting?

5. I write this webble to honor and share my life and so there will be some record and witness to my journey and family life.

6. When my kids behave well, I am happy that I play some part in (and try so hard) training them to clean their room/ask politely for things/feel eager to be of service to their friends, etc.- all that good stuff.

7. When my kids don't behave well, I have specific strategies to help guide them and I really try not to take it personally. At the same time, I can acknowledge my part in problems that arise and think about better ways to act or arrange things without freaking out. This is a big deal for me because I used to be perfect and a victim of all angry outbursts.

8. I am interested in becoming and not in proving that I have arrived.

9. I am really trying to develop the ability to laugh at myself. It's hard for me because I really like being taken seriously. To show my progress: if I were to choose a TV character that I'd like to be, it would be a toss up between Strawberry Shortcake and Stephani from Lazytown.

10. I like figuring out the big picture, getting closer to the underlying truth of things, and sharing what I learned with people in a way they can understand. My professor that evaluated my teaching of ESL in grad school said I was a 'Crackerjack' teacher. I think that's good.

Can I hear from: Mom, Layli, Khalil, and Billy?

Posted by Bahiyyih at October 4, 2007 10:13 AM

I'm so excited we'll be in Maine together! I've never been to a Forum as a participant, but people really love it it seems. And part of our goal is to help people feel refreshed and rejuvenated (being a treasurer ain't easy I'm coming to learn). Woohoo!

Posted by: Husayn at October 4, 2007 08:58 PM

This list makes me so happy, Bahiyyih! Thank you so much for sharing.

Posted by: Katie B at October 5, 2007 04:38 PM

I love your list! And sure wish I could be joining you two in Maine. I've been really wanting to go back to Green Acre lately!

Posted by: liza at October 5, 2007 05:16 PM

I think I can tackle some of those ten things I like about myself tonight.

1. I love that I can experience the sweet feeling of being a pipeline for creative thoughts. It's not a constant, but when it happens, I am filled with joy.

2. I love the results of my search for a spiritual path. Seeking truth, finding it, committing to it, and not being swayed by the disapproval of others, are precious to me.

3. I love that I can see how difficulties in my life have lead to deeper understanding.

4. I love that I know that every creature, from the atom to the tree to the whale to the ocean to me, is singing the same song.

5. I like having discovered, not by my own volition, that I can write music (especially music for children), and be an editor. I always thought I wanted to be a ballet dancer and an actor.

6. I'm grateful I can see that, when I find someone irritating, it's usually because they are showing me something I don't like about myself. It has deepened my compassion.

7. I like that I eventually found enough courage to separate myself from unhealthy relationships.

8. I like that I can listen to peoples' difficulties and not try to fix everything, most of the time.

9. I like that I admire things about the people I'm related to.

10. I like that I can bring warmth and security to a child's heart by reading favorite books, by singing with them, and by being with them in the moment.

Posted by: Nana at November 3, 2007 12:47 AM