Here is the secret to my super ninja powers in my family. The way I fight the super ego and all forces of dissolution and disunity.
1. From the Buddha: The causes of suffering are craving pleasure and not seeing things as they really are. (Especially that last bit. Whenever I say that to myself, and just look at what IS and accept it as a starting point, I feel an inner calm immediately and I know where to begin. )
2. From the Baha'i Writings: When a thought of war comes, oppose it by a stronger thought of peace. (One of my thoughts of peace is my vision of a peaceful home and anything I have set up to make it so. Like discipline systems. And making sure I'm connected to people.)
3. From the Dog Whisperer, Cesar Millan (No, he does NOT belong on this list by any kind of rank or importance, it's just something that's useful to me right now.): Be calm and assertive. (I am most effective at maintaining discipline of children and communicating well with spouse when I take on the persona of unruffable calm and undeniable assertion. I am the wall. I am the boundary.)
These three ideas are what goes through my head when I'm faced with the daily problems that come up with three growing girls with independant and widely differing natures and a (loving) spouse with a very different personality and upbringing from mine. There's a lot of potential conflict and misunderstanding. But there is also a lot of potential for growth and making something really new and interesting: a peaceful family. Super ninja style.